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Buy, Sell & What?

Fat Mum Slim /

Buy, Sell & What?

Hello. My name is Chantelle, and I am seemingly obsessed with Buy, Swap & Sell groups. I don’t have anything to sell, and I most certainly don’t want to buy anything but I CAN NOT LOOK AWAY.

A friend sent me a link to the group because they were talking about Gallstones, and being the good friend she is, she thought I’d like to have a read. So I did.

And then… from there, I’ve wasted countless hours people watching, and I’ve come to the conclusion that PEOPLE ARE WEIRD.

Not even a little bit weird, a whole lot weird.

To be honest, this recent group-joining wasn’t my first foray into Buy, Swap & Sell groups. I’m a purger. I like to clean and get rid of stuff. When I was pregnant with Lulu I had a pram that I wanted to get rid of because I wanted a new one {logical when you’re pregnant, don’t judge}. I didn’t want money for it. I just wanted it picked up and gone promptly. So I joined a local group on Facebook, and put it up. FREE! The pram is one of those fancy ones that cost as much as my first car did back in the olden days, so you can bet that pram was snapped up within seconds. I don’t even think the person who ‘won’ it had babies or was going to have babies, they were probably going to sell it on the black market at a later date, and fund their next house party.

When you sell something or give it away in a Buy, Swap & Sell group, the first person to comment gets it and then the rest write NIL {next in line} and this can go on forever. 1567 people could write NIL in hopes that the 1566 people in front of them would somehow disappear off the face of the earth {such hopes!}.

I didn’t want to meet the people who won, I didn’t want to have to see them or have awkward conversations, I just wanted them to pick it up ASAP so I could make room for my new pram. So I told them I was putting it on the front doorstep and that I wouldn’t be home.

Except they arrived at the same time that I arrived home and I had to talk to strangers. Me no likey.

A month or so later, I gave away a bookcase. One person snagged it in the comments, and then came all of these secret messages in my inbox of people wanted to illegally obtain the dingy bookcase, “Let me have it! I’ll be at your house in 3 minutes to get it!”

THEY DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE I LIVE! {Do they? Eek. *Side eyes*}.

I left that group quickly and told Hubby that I was aborting the whole VERY weird situation. Me no handle no weirdness.

Since then Hubby has joined and sold some stuff since {air-conditioning unit, surfboard, BBQ}, he seems to be able to handle the craziness. He just shuts down any insanity in a heartbeat. I’d say that he’s well practiced being married to me.

Since leaving that group after the bookcase, and now joining this new group… I’m newly obsessed. Like seriously it’s like watching a really bad TV show, but not being able to look away.

I keep taking screenshots of things and asking family and friends if they need them, because SUCH A BARGAIN. I asked my mum if she wanted a dog, despite not having a fence, my sister if she wanted a cheap holiday, despite just returning from one, and my husband if he wanted to buy a houseboat, despite having a very nice house of our own, on land too.

Sometimes it goes a bit south, mind you. I saw a lady ask how much someone would swap a $5 note for, another one wanted to sell some orgasm balls {eek!} and really old microwave that might not even work. For real. I’ve even seen an air guitar up for grabs.

I CAN NOT LOOK AWAY.

Put on the popcorn, because who needs Netflix and Chill when you can have… Buy, Swap & Sell and laugh your butt off.

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve seen in a Buy, Swap & Sell group?

  • MyInnerPollyanna

    I can’t join those groups, I’d spend all day watching them and snorting in amusement. Fortunately some of my friends are lovely enough to screenshot and share the good stuff. One of the best I remember was a two litre flavoured milk (maybe Iced Coffee) that had a markdown sticker on it. The poster said they’d drunk half of it but they’d charge less than half of what they paid for (I have a feeling they had no cup and drank straight from the container) if anyone would meet them in the CBD in the next ten minutes. Pretty sure the ending was something like “Hurry, it’s still pretty cold!”

  • Leanne Chester

    Haha, I love it too. I live in ‘Boganville’ (bogan and proud baby!) so that makes it even more entertaining. Some peoples be very weird where I live. I sometimes have to tap dozing hubby to share the entertainment but he doesn’t really get it so I then screen shot and message my girlfriend who totally gets it…ps: I’m looking for a vintage cane outdoor lounge setting if you happen to see that! ?

    • Yeah, they’re never as enthusiastic or amused as you hope, damn Hubbies!

      I’ll let you know if I see that setting. 😉

  • Barb N

    … I don’t join any groups like this because I know I’d get hooked….. I tend to be a bit obsessive….
    I very rarely go to garage sales and second hand shops these days….. it’s fascinating what people ‘pass on’ to be sold…
    Took me 2 years to empty my house from all the excess bargains I had accumulated.
    Have a good day Chantelle…
    Hugs… Barb xxx

  • Helen

    Yep, it’s a weird world. And the fights that begin over the NIL coz someone typed it 7 seconds before the person who wrote sold. Then all the ” I will pick it up tomorrow” stuff and then a whole week of WHICH tomorrow??? Some stuff sold is an amazing bargain, but a lot is absolute rubbish. It takes all kinds .

  • Lauren Russo – Love_Live_Loz

    Back when I was on Facetube, I saw someone (who I knew from school) selling used dummies ‘with no chew marks’ for $3 each. What the actual… Wierd.

  • Denise Blust Vermillion

    My friend has a penis plant and she posts pictures on FB. She has chickens too. I bought a stroller for my dogs to ride in because they don’t walk too fast, and she called ME weird lol.

  • I’ve never been in one of those groups but I think I need to, just for the entertainment value. As my mum always says, “there’s none so strange as folk.”

  • When we were moving from Qatar to Greece I went a little crazy on buy it, sell it, swap it! Some of the furniture we got was fab and I did furnish our home with some great stuff, but there were lots of duds along the way…
    For some strange reason I sold the wii fit and then bought the newer version the next day, it’s still in its box 2 years later! I should sell it but I’m too scared to look at it now I don’t trust myself!

  • I’m part of about 4 of them, we buy and sell a lot lol. I’ve seen some weird stuff!

  • Prisca

    You would love “Darwin Beer Economy!” I don’t even drink but find it amusing to see what people are trying to trade for alcohol!!

  • I’m glad I’m not the only person who does this. I particularly love the gipsy selling groups; they’re totally insane!

  • Bec

    Oh I used to love these! My favourite listing was a big stack of DVDs, mostly comedies, but with a few random pornos thrown in with names like Big Juggs 3. haha! Weird.

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