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Letter to Luella: one & two months old

Fat Mum Slim /

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Dear Luella,

On your first night as my baby the nurse took you so I could sleep. As she carried you out of the room I wondered if I’d know your cry if I heard it, or if I’d even know which baby was mine if they put you in a baby line-up. I quickly drifted off to sleep {or passed out from sheer exhaustion} and woke now and then to the sound of babies crying around the hospital. ‘I don’t think that’s her,’ I thought to myself.

A little later I woke to the sound of a baby crying, no louder than the others and I knew it was you. I sat upright and waited, because somehow I knew you were hungry and they’d bring you back to me. And they did.

It amazes me that for 9 months while you grew inside me, I loved you unconditionally and yet I knew nothing about you. I didn’t know your name, the colour of your hair, what you looked like or what your cry sounded like. It was all a mystery, and then you arrived and I can’t imagine not knowing. In an instant after meeting you, you were my littlest girl.

I imagined baby number two would be a breeze, well… at least easier than baby number one. I imagined that there’d be less crying, less anxiety and I’d just know what to do and when to do it. I imagined you’d ease into life outside the womb happily.

I was slightly wrong. Life was a breeze for the first 3 days. You were chilled out and happy. I cried happy tears because I had my beautiful, calm baby. Seriously, those happy tears flowed. I wanted to soak you up and stop time, because you were just perfect and life was wonderful.

On the night of day 3 you got cranky, and I spent hours trying to make you calm again. The crankiness has stayed around a little, but you’re not any less perfect or wonderful. I’ve still cried those happy tears and wanted life to stand still so I could soak you up. That new baby smell, that sweet little body, and just everything about you.

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You already have your likes and dislikes sorted. You like staring at the ceiling fan {yep, forget fancy toys and mobiles the fan is what you want}, you adore foot massages, chilling out in the bath, being a nudie rudie and you love to feed. You dislike dummies, being in the car and being more than one metre away from your mama.

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And now you’re two months old you like to smile. You first smiled at Dada and I might have remarked, “What?! With all the hard work I put in and you give HIM the first smile? What’s with that?” And then we laughed. You will give me the first laugh and ‘I love you’ though, won’t you?

You adore your big sister, although sometimes she’s a little too enthusiastic with her cuddles, but I think you’re used to it. She’s going to be {and already is} an awesome big sister. She likes to pick you up {sometimes when I’m not looking, eek!}, sing you songs, change your nappy and share the bath tub with you.

You’ve only been here for 2 months, but it truly feels like forever. We’ve found our groove, albeit a little bumpy along the way.

I love you Miss Luella.
Love, Mama.

  • Kirsty S

    Gorgeous letter, Telle. And hasn’t she grown oodles and oodles already! It’s going to be so much fun watching her grow up. And if you ever find that pause button then let me know… the second (and third… oh, boy, that third one of mine!) want desperately to do stuff that the first does so she’ll be up and racing before you know it.

  • Kylie

    Reading your blog closely lately… Due any day with baby number 2. It’s a girl and I already have another 2.5 yr old girl. I really struggled in the first months with my first and EVERYONE says the second is easier but I can’t help but be a little cautious with that. After all I’ll ALSO have a toddler and I find days with her tough at times without a newborn! We will soon see. Glad you’re finding time between the mayhem to soak her up x

  • Samantha Irawan

    Loved this!

    I could very much relate however I spent nine months not bonding or loving the baby inside of me (although like you said, the moment I saw him was magical!)

    Antinatal depression is real – help me spread awareness 🙂

  • Teresa K

    I so love your letters to your children. They will treasure these. My kids are now 17 and 19. I’m thinking of writing letters about their lives up to this point.

  • kforkarli

    Oh she is beautiful. Love that little bubba smile x

  • Deb

    such curly little toes!

  • Michelle @ Jarrah Jungle

    2 months already wow the time goes by so fast, she is still a little giggly bundle of cute babyness 🙂

  • Luella is just divine! I often think of the night my number two was born, I was wondering how she would fit in, if she’d be good friends with her big sister. Gosh it feels like 5 minutes ago instead of five years ago. Well done, beautiful mama. xx

  • Debbie Huxstep

    Ha ha Chantelle, my grandson Ace who was born just after Luella (August 26) is also in love with the ceiling fan…stares at it with this mesmerised look on his face and follows it with his eyes. Luella is just gorgeous xx

  • Vicki @ Knocked Up and Abroad

    This is so precious. So lovely. I write letters to my children for their birthday about the year that they’ve had. Very simular to this. I also adore that you take a monthly pic of them on the lamby rug (which is to die for too by the way) so you can really see how they’ve changed. This post just makes me feel warm and fuzzy in every way!

  • Aw! Nothing like getting to know a new little person <3

  • Terry Beth Tucker Barnhart

    Sweet lusciousness!

  • Melissa Long

    AW! Love these monthly pictures, too adorable!

  • Samantha Hayden

    Awww that is just adorable!

  • Cara Howard

    OMG she is a PERFECT angel. SO BEAUTIFUL!

  • Steph @ Sassmouth Mama

    She is just so beautiful! This letter is so heartfelt and such a gift to Luella and all of us who read it and are taken back to those early days when a gummy smile made all the cranky nights worthwhile.

  • Lisa Mckenzie

    Beautiful letter Chantelle if only they could stay tiny babies a little longer,they are so soft,sweet and smell beautiful (well most of the time) enjoy your little Luella and I hope Lacey continues being an awesome big sis x

  • Leanne Blackman

    That is so beautiful…

  • DEE

    So beautiful..

@Fatmumslim