The skewers or the ice cream

We’d just been to the supermarket where we bought various groceries and ice cream. Now you know the urgency that presents itself when you’ve bought ice cream on a summer-y day. Parents be all like, “We can’t stop, we’ve got ice cream in the back.”

Remember those cries from your childhood?

I needed to get fancy skewers though, so I had to make a mad dash to the $2 shop to grab them, and leave the ice cream in the back unattended.

It was just Lacey and I, and the $2 shop is like the mecca of cool stuff according to her. Cheap hair clips, textas that die within 6 hours of purchase and more pool floating devices than you can count. I urged her as we walked down the aisles; “Don’t look! Keep walking! We’re not buying! Don’t ask!”

Eventually we weaved our way to the checkout, where about 6 people stood in front of us. It was then I had to make a decision; was it the skewers or the ice cream? The skewers won. So we waited.

You can notice a lot while standing in lines for long periods of time, including how patient you are and how many times a 6 year old can ask, “Can I pleeeaaaaaaaaase just get this?”

As we waited a woman and her son walked in. The son was in his 20s and they were searching for a phone cover. The son was mentally disabled, {not diagnosing just observing}. He spoke in a way that was loud, enthusiastic and slightly confronting, and difficult to understand.

“Get that one! Get that one!” he yelled enthusiastically to his mother.

“Just wait Daniel, I need to make sure it fits.”

He continued to encourage her to get the pink one at the top.

His voice could be heard all around the store. People stared, others ignored them.

I looked down at Lacey and she was watching on. Lacey has a tendency to stare, and my initial reaction was to tell her to stop looking.

But then I stopped myself.

Because I saw her watch on, and she wasn’t looking to judge, but because she cared. I could see in her eyes that she was wondering if he was okay. I wanted her to care, and I want her to continue caring.

If she’d stopped watching, she would have missed the gentle way the mother listened to her son and explained things to him. She would have missed the mother encouraging her son to try on the brightest sunglasses on the stand, and then telling him just how cool he looked while wearing them, and how cool he felt when checked out his reflection in the mirror. If she’d stopped looking she would have missed the kind glance the mother gave us. If she’d stopped watching and caring, perhaps she’d grow to think that it’s best to ignore what’s going on in the world {even right in front of us} and pretend that it’s not happening.

I didn’t read the bit in the parenting manual {what parenting manual?} where it says what to do in these situations, but I know that I want to help Lacey grow into a caring, compassionate, thoughtful person. And when she has one of her meltdowns in public {which she does}, I hope that people watch on with care and kindness, and not judgement.

I’m not sure what’s right or wrong, or even if there is, but I do hope that I’m helping shape my daughter into a good human being, because doesn’t the world need more of those?

And in case you’re wondering, the ice cream survived.