Yesterday the Hubster headed off for a few weeks for a work course thing. If you follow me on Facebook and Instagram, you may have seen this melodramatic photo.
We will survive. I know it’s going to be fine. I’m not that worried. I’m independent, I can do the stuff. I filled the freezer so we won’t starve {I’ve probably got enough body fat stored to last me a few years at least, it’s the kids I worry about}. I’ll miss him though. I’ll miss him telling me long stories about things I don’t really care about but listen to anyway. I’ll miss the way he’ll find any opportunity to do a quick bum grab when I least expect it.
But let’s talk about the real issue here…
I’m going to have to step up and do those things that I pretend that I can’t do {or most of the time refuse to do} because, quite simply, they’re FREAKING gross. Yeah, that stuff.
I’ll happily scrub a toilet, or change a poopy nappy. I don’t care about that stuff.
BUT, I hate to change the bin. Is that not the crappiest job in the world? Pulling the bin bag out of that plastic bin, and surviving the challenge that is not getting any gross bin stuff on you. I don’t care if I only put that leftover porridge in there 3 seconds earlier, it’s contaminated and will BURN ME LIKE ACID, and it better not touch me.
And picking up dog poop. Gross. My siblings and I were my Nana’s least favourite grandchildren. I know that sounds like a weird statement, but we were. The other grandkids were allowed the soft drink and to play inside, yet we were sent out to do chores. Somehow I always ended up doing the task of cleaning up the dog poop. Little tiny Pug Dog poop.
I’ve now upgraded myself to Labrador poop, and we all know you don’t need a visual on that one.
So, world, I’d like this to be known: I have been abandoned to do ALL THE CHORES I’VE BEEN AVOIDING ALL THESE YEARS.
And I might even have to mow the lawns, fight snakes and kill the wasps that seem to make their way inside each day.
What chores do you most hate to do?
P.S. Single mums and people that do everything at home, you can’t see me right now but my hat is off. Like so off, it’s not funny. You guys are amazing.
Know exactly how you feel. I did 8 weeks solo with a 16month old and 3 yr old. I had to do all those things but the bins are the worst! And like, that needs to happen every night! Hate changing the bins. That is definitely the mans job around here. The best bit about being solo though? It’s totally fine to have cereal for dinner when there is no man to cook for! And you have full control of the remote! 4 weeks will pass by so quickly!! xx
I am loving porridge or crumpets for dinner, just quietly! x
Hahaha I avoid the dog poo issue too!! Eep! I used to be a FIFO wife, but I am so relieved I haven’t had to be a FIFO mama (so far…)! I was faced with chores I hated every second week (or more) for years! x
Oh no! That must have been so hard. I hope it doesn’t happen again!
I always used to get huge spiders, cockroaches and wasps when mine was doing night shift. Like wtf bugs, they just know I’m sh*t scared of them so they all come out when I have nobody to protect me lol.
I think the Universe knows and it decides it’s the perfect time to test you.
If we get another snake, I’m outta here. I’ll move house.
About 7 years ago my huz spent 24 days overseas for work, I missed him terribly and after 2 weeks would cry most nights. So sooky! I hate cleaning the toilet, hate it! (Gag). Sounds like you’re prepared, hope the time flies xx
Me too. I hope it whizzes by.
I do the bin here 🙁 everyone else piles it higher and higher like the leaning tower of pisa and when it crashes down on the floor, I get to pick up the bits! Grrrrr!
The bits? Awesome. I would kill someone for doing that!
I don’t mind the bin but hubby does the stuff I really don’t want to do like cockroach swatting or spider spotting. I just cannot deal! One month will fly by, you can do this, bin, poop and all!
Ha! I hope there’s no spiders in his absence. I did the poop last night and survived. I’m sure there will be more tonight for me!
My mom said that was what did it for her after my dad died. She was grappling with everything until the first spider entered her bedroom and my dad wasn’t there to kill it…que hysterics based on irrational anger because he wasn’t there. We all have our “stuff”…the jobs that we do, the jobs that our spouse does…and it’s horrid when “their” stuff becomes “our” stuff by no choice of our own. (PS…saw the “paint” thing…so much for those Angels. SIGH) For me it’s cleaning the cat box…UGH. And we don’t have a dog because I flat out refuse to pick up dog poop. Oddly enough the bin doesn’t bother me! LOL! I wish you a quick couple of weeks!
Oh gosh, that makes me want to cry. I can imagine the first spider for her, and what a challenge that would have been.
Oh that paint, it could have sent me over the edge… but I laughed and cleaned and cleaned and cleaned and let it go!
It reminds me that, when my hubby is gone, it’s probably just for the short term and I should just adult and shut up…but I want to WHINE! LOL! I don’t like adulting when he’s here much less when he’s away! LOL! And yes, the paint reminded me of the time my son decided that what was in his diaper should be all over the walls (crib, floor…etc). For a moment I thought it might be easier to move! LOL! Just think of the stories you will get to tell her when she’s older!
My husband just had a little vacation to the US for 2 weeks and left me with our 8 and 5 year old. We all saw him off at the airport and sobbed ugly tears. All my friends with babies were saying how easy it was going to be, that my kids were so independent now, I should enjoy the nights alone to binge watch whatever I wanted on Netflix but the whole thing sucked. I hated being alone, sleeping in my bed alone and the days actually just all running into each other because he didn’t come home at night to debrief our days. I sound like such a sook but I love my husband and love being around him so that 2 weeks felt like forever. I am happy to say he has now returned, bought me lots of lovely presents and it felt like he never left. I hope the time flies for you Chantelle and that you know that you aren’t the only one who doesn’t want to do it all alone. Big kudos to those single parents out there. I don’t know how they do it!
PS. Love the title of this post. Gave me a great chuckle!
I think when it comes down to it, it’s different from our normal and it’s OK not to like it. I miss him. He misses us. I like our normal that we created together.
I hope he brings gifts! Fingers crossed. 😛
I get upset when hubs is away for 3-4 days. A month? Hats off to YOU! The chores I most dislike are anything to do with the garden. Inside stuff? I can totally handle. Except ironing. I avoid that like the plague. x
I did the dog poop last night. I’m waiting for my medal.
Are we married to the same man??? Those long stories and sneaky bum grabs!! Enough already !!!! (But don’t even stop)
Haha! Yeah don’t stop! 😛
Best of luck Chantelle – I am sure you and the girls are going to have a wonderful time together. Now is the perfect time for Lacey to earn some pocket money. Raya picks up after our golden retriever using a shovel thing and gets a very inflated pocket money rate for doing it. When hubby is away it is the fact that there is no tag team for the bed bathtime routine that does my head in. Single mums are absolute super heroes.