Life lessons I hope my daughter discovers {& 1 lesson I hope I master… fast}.
17 thoughts on “Life lessons I hope my daughter discovers {& 1 lesson I hope I master… fast}.”
Hi chantelle, love your blog! I’m a long time reader, first time commentator 🙂
This really hit a nerve with me, you’ve basically summed up all the things I hope for my little boy & re letting go – I’m going through the process of getting him to sleep in his own room & I never thought I’d find it so… Difficult! Haha 🙂 my husband keeps saying the little one doesn’t have a worry about it, that it’s actually me – and he’s right!
Sounds like you’re doing a great job 🙂
What a wonderful post. As relevant to me in my sixties as it is to a young person just starting out. I loved it.
I love this post. So many lessons to learn for both the young and the young at heart! This one shall be book-marked for sure. xx
Brilliant post. Loved it.
Every parent need this. Grow up with an open mind, be kind and you will go far!
We are NEVER ready to let go, yet we are SO proud of every Independant step they take! if she learns those life lessons she will be well prepared for the World and you’re job will have been done! Keep in mind we are never TRULY redundant as I realised when we became empty nesters last year when our 25 year old ‘baby boy’ left home. He moved house then set off for a trip overseas, leaving his place a mess, which I popped in to tidy, taking my mum along for company. I decided to finish unpacking what he hadn’t and a brown paper bag fell out of his uni satchel, my Mum picked it up and said “oh, it’s all little sachets” I looked thinking I didn’t want food lying round to find it was a bag of condoms, which I put away for future use…..also whilst he was away he got accepted into Melbourne. Uni to do his Masters, which he had applied for but gave no thought to how he might complete the enrolment from the U.S, so once again Mum power was required to do all the online acceptances and enrolment procedures, which you almost NEED a masters degree to accomplish!! He was very happy to come back to a clean house, a lecture on taking his bag of goodies WITH him next time and Uni sorted! So my love, we are NEVER completely done, just put ‘on call’ really. As for the chopstick question, NO, wish I could but never really got the knack!!
Wow she was ready – look at how much speed she had up!! There is a beautiful song I sing to Raya at bedtime and the words I love to it are “Let my love give you roots, and help you find your wings, I’ll have tears as you take off, but I’ll cheer as you fly”. Says it all really
that’s a really lovely quote! What song is it from?
This is so timely for me, my little one is only 2.5 but I let go of her at swim lessons … Well the instructor pried open my fingers and said ‘u have to let her go’ …and she swam!! She didn’t need me holding her up, but I hope i will always be there to catch her when she needs me. It was a realisation all too soon. Told hubby. He didn’t get the significance and thought I was being silly 🙂
Lol! But in our 20’s – going out WAS more important than paying the phone bill!
I will find it hard to let go, I only hope that when they fall they can pick themselves up. Or come running back to mum!
Excellent post. And I can tell you as a Mumma to a 20 year old who has taken off overseas for the first time without me, you never want to let go. I think her boyfriend thought I would end up coming with them i was hanging onto her that hard at the airport.
This is a beautiful post and you’re such a beautiful person Telle. Great lessons! One of my biggest life lessons has been that bitterness only hurts myself, not the person or thing I’m feeling bitter about. Often it’s best just to let it go.
In less than 2 weeks I am going to have to let go of my “baby” – my 25 year old baby! He has ASD and Bi-polar and is about to emigrate to the US to marry a lovely girl. I keep telling myself that he’s a big boy now and that his lovely girlfriend has him “sussed” and will take care of him. And then last week I suddenly realised….. worrying about how he’ll cope isn’t the issue at all! It’s worrying about how I’ll cope. I’ve always been there for him, helping, advising, leading, guiding, protecting. For 25 years. He no longer needs me (although I know he’ll always love and care about me). But I need him! I hope I have managed to teach all the things you mention (except the tidy you room bit!) and learn to let him go to Travel, Explore and Have Fun. Now! How do I see him off at Heathrow without making a right twit of myself? 😀
Thank you for this timely post – I really will try to remember it – and make sure he remembers everything I taught him. Jude.x
Great post Chantelle, learning to let go is a huge hurdle for us mums, even now and my youngest is 21!! Being a parent is hard work, it comes with no orientation, no instruction manual and no second chances. All you can hope is that you somehow manage to get it right and what you have outlined above are pretty much on the nose. My daughters (the eldest and middle of my children) are settled, have good jobs, great men in their lives and seem to have worked out what life is about. I have had enormous problems with my youngest (a boy now 21), misdiagnosed as a child with ADHD when in actual fact I believe he was and still is a high functioning Aspergers, but I hope that I have instilled in him some of the values, hopes and dreams so that he enjoys life. To be honest if my son had been born first I would have had serious doubts and concerns at my ability to be a parent and I have regrets about how he was parented but you do your very best with what you can do at the time and you just hope that you have done ok. My biggest hope is that he will one day wake up and realise that he is a very special young man…he is intelligent, funny, caring, generous and loving..I know that and one day he will too..well I can only hope.
Oh boy. Lessons. The first one would be “you get what you give”. I agree – treat people the way you want to be treated. The second is don’t just dream it – do it. The third – keep an open mind. I personally have just fallen into every decision in my life. Most were made for me and I just followed along. Don’t do that.Take your dream and run with it. Take a chance, you might fail but you might just succeed.
Letting go of your children is always hard. My eldest is applying to a university in Turkey to do her masters in archeology – we live on the west coast of Canada. I do not want her so far away but I want her to do what she loves. She wants to work in the near East and so Turkey is the place for her. My youngest daughter (she is 20) is special needs and I am so protective of her. I have to be, but I am trying to let go just a little. Still making sure she is safe but letting her be independent, make decisions and maybe fail a little bit. She is a lesson in herself as she always is happy and loving. Win or lose she smiles and hugs the person next to her who failed and is crying. You are doing it right – and you will find it easier with your second. Lacey is your first and the first is always the child that has to lead mom through all her fears.
Go Lacey!! I want my kids to be honest. It is okay to make mistakes, and it is okay to do things wrong. But own up to them, don’t shy away and take responsibility. x
I want to teach my children to NOT sit on the sidelines and watch the world go by. No, good things DO NOT come to those who wait – good things comes to those that work their butts off and do good by others and themselves.
Hi chantelle, love your blog! I’m a long time reader, first time commentator 🙂
This really hit a nerve with me, you’ve basically summed up all the things I hope for my little boy & re letting go – I’m going through the process of getting him to sleep in his own room & I never thought I’d find it so… Difficult! Haha 🙂 my husband keeps saying the little one doesn’t have a worry about it, that it’s actually me – and he’s right!
Sounds like you’re doing a great job 🙂
What a wonderful post. As relevant to me in my sixties as it is to a young person just starting out. I loved it.
I love this post. So many lessons to learn for both the young and the young at heart! This one shall be book-marked for sure. xx
Brilliant post. Loved it.
Every parent need this. Grow up with an open mind, be kind and you will go far!
We are NEVER ready to let go, yet we are SO proud of every Independant step they take! if she learns those life lessons she will be well prepared for the World and you’re job will have been done! Keep in mind we are never TRULY redundant as I realised when we became empty nesters last year when our 25 year old ‘baby boy’ left home. He moved house then set off for a trip overseas, leaving his place a mess, which I popped in to tidy, taking my mum along for company. I decided to finish unpacking what he hadn’t and a brown paper bag fell out of his uni satchel, my Mum picked it up and said “oh, it’s all little sachets” I looked thinking I didn’t want food lying round to find it was a bag of condoms, which I put away for future use…..also whilst he was away he got accepted into Melbourne. Uni to do his Masters, which he had applied for but gave no thought to how he might complete the enrolment from the U.S, so once again Mum power was required to do all the online acceptances and enrolment procedures, which you almost NEED a masters degree to accomplish!! He was very happy to come back to a clean house, a lecture on taking his bag of goodies WITH him next time and Uni sorted! So my love, we are NEVER completely done, just put ‘on call’ really. As for the chopstick question, NO, wish I could but never really got the knack!!
Wow she was ready – look at how much speed she had up!! There is a beautiful song I sing to Raya at bedtime and the words I love to it are “Let my love give you roots, and help you find your wings, I’ll have tears as you take off, but I’ll cheer as you fly”. Says it all really
that’s a really lovely quote! What song is it from?
This is so timely for me, my little one is only 2.5 but I let go of her at swim lessons … Well the instructor pried open my fingers and said ‘u have to let her go’ …and she swam!! She didn’t need me holding her up, but I hope i will always be there to catch her when she needs me. It was a realisation all too soon. Told hubby. He didn’t get the significance and thought I was being silly 🙂
Lol! But in our 20’s – going out WAS more important than paying the phone bill!
I will find it hard to let go, I only hope that when they fall they can pick themselves up. Or come running back to mum!
Excellent post. And I can tell you as a Mumma to a 20 year old who has taken off overseas for the first time without me, you never want to let go. I think her boyfriend thought I would end up coming with them i was hanging onto her that hard at the airport.
http://iliska-dreams.blogspot.com.au/
This is a beautiful post and you’re such a beautiful person Telle. Great lessons! One of my biggest life lessons has been that bitterness only hurts myself, not the person or thing I’m feeling bitter about. Often it’s best just to let it go.
In less than 2 weeks I am going to have to let go of my “baby” – my 25 year old baby! He has ASD and Bi-polar and is about to emigrate to the US to marry a lovely girl. I keep telling myself that he’s a big boy now and that his lovely girlfriend has him “sussed” and will take care of him. And then last week I suddenly realised….. worrying about how he’ll cope isn’t the issue at all! It’s worrying about how I’ll cope. I’ve always been there for him, helping, advising, leading, guiding, protecting. For 25 years. He no longer needs me (although I know he’ll always love and care about me). But I need him! I hope I have managed to teach all the things you mention (except the tidy you room bit!) and learn to let him go to Travel, Explore and Have Fun. Now! How do I see him off at Heathrow without making a right twit of myself? 😀
Thank you for this timely post – I really will try to remember it – and make sure he remembers everything I taught him. Jude.x
Great post Chantelle, learning to let go is a huge hurdle for us mums, even now and my youngest is 21!! Being a parent is hard work, it comes with no orientation, no instruction manual and no second chances. All you can hope is that you somehow manage to get it right and what you have outlined above are pretty much on the nose. My daughters (the eldest and middle of my children) are settled, have good jobs, great men in their lives and seem to have worked out what life is about. I have had enormous problems with my youngest (a boy now 21), misdiagnosed as a child with ADHD when in actual fact I believe he was and still is a high functioning Aspergers, but I hope that I have instilled in him some of the values, hopes and dreams so that he enjoys life. To be honest if my son had been born first I would have had serious doubts and concerns at my ability to be a parent and I have regrets about how he was parented but you do your very best with what you can do at the time and you just hope that you have done ok. My biggest hope is that he will one day wake up and realise that he is a very special young man…he is intelligent, funny, caring, generous and loving..I know that and one day he will too..well I can only hope.
Oh boy. Lessons. The first one would be “you get what you give”. I agree – treat people the way you want to be treated. The second is don’t just dream it – do it. The third – keep an open mind. I personally have just fallen into every decision in my life. Most were made for me and I just followed along. Don’t do that.Take your dream and run with it. Take a chance, you might fail but you might just succeed.
Letting go of your children is always hard. My eldest is applying to a university in Turkey to do her masters in archeology – we live on the west coast of Canada. I do not want her so far away but I want her to do what she loves. She wants to work in the near East and so Turkey is the place for her. My youngest daughter (she is 20) is special needs and I am so protective of her. I have to be, but I am trying to let go just a little. Still making sure she is safe but letting her be independent, make decisions and maybe fail a little bit. She is a lesson in herself as she always is happy and loving. Win or lose she smiles and hugs the person next to her who failed and is crying. You are doing it right – and you will find it easier with your second. Lacey is your first and the first is always the child that has to lead mom through all her fears.
Go Lacey!! I want my kids to be honest. It is okay to make mistakes, and it is okay to do things wrong. But own up to them, don’t shy away and take responsibility. x
As one of my favourite bloggers, I have nominated you for the Very Inspirational Blogger Award. To see how this works, please see my post http://betweenloveandchaos.wordpress.com/2013/03/06/very-inspiring-blogger-award-post-that-i-eventually-got-around-to-writing/ Keep up the wonderful posting, you are truly an inspiration.
I want to teach my children to NOT sit on the sidelines and watch the world go by. No, good things DO NOT come to those who wait – good things comes to those that work their butts off and do good by others and themselves.