ou’re massive, he snarled, his words laced with venom. He didn’t yell. He didn’t have to. I heard him. And as soon as I did, I felt my spirit shatter, and he took my breath away.
He was nobody. Nobody to me, and nobody I knew. He’ll forever be that nobody that looked me in the eyes, and stole every last inch of confidence I had mustered. I was only walking across the road, to get a manicure in fact. A treat I give myself every now and then. A treat I feel I deserve, and one I rarely feel guilty about.
I was on a high. I was wearing my best dress. I’d just had the best morning ever. We’d been exploring out on the water. I was so soulfully happy. And then I couldn’t function. I couldn’t get a manicure. I needed to be home, and in my comfort zone. He was nobody, and his words weren’t particularly the worst I could hear, or have heard, but I was starting to crumble. I cried. He knocked the breath, and happiness right out of me.
This nobody who probably forgot me as soon as he closed his mouth, became a nobody that I thought about everyday since. It’s been about two months, I guess. He helped release an anxiety that was gurgling away within. It’s not all consuming, it’s lingering. I know it’s there.
I realised last week that I was allowing this nobody to keep me where I am. At a standstill. I love exercising, but I only did it in the mornings when nobodys like him were still fast asleep. And sometimes, due to Hubby’s work schedule, I need to do whatever exercise I can, when I can. So some weeks meant I didn’t get to exercise at all.
I had a little Oprah Lightbulb Moment last week. I was allowing some Nobody to steal my sunshine. And it just will not do. No, it will just not do at all.
So I’ve been walking over the past week. And loving it. That morning sun just feeds my soul. I love seeing that sun rise on the horizon and everyone seems so happy and free at that hour.
I did forget to ask you how you were all doing on the Skinny for Santa challenge last week. So I’d love to hear how you’ve been going and what your goals are. My goal for this next week is to continue eating well and exercise as much as I can. I’ve been getting headaches, which I think are from dehydration so I am going to concentrate of getting lots of water.
So share away…