Steal My Sunshine.

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ou’re massive, he snarled, his words laced with venom. He didn’t yell. He didn’t have to. I heard him. And as soon as I did, I felt my spirit shatter, and he took my breath away.

He was nobody. Nobody to me, and nobody I knew. He’ll forever be that nobody that looked me in the eyes, and stole every last inch of confidence I had mustered. I was only walking across the road, to get a manicure in fact. A treat I give myself every now and then. A treat I feel I deserve, and one I rarely feel guilty about.

I was on a high. I was wearing my best dress. I’d just had the best morning ever. We’d been exploring out on the water. I was so soulfully happy. And then I couldn’t function. I couldn’t get a manicure. I needed to be home, and in my comfort zone. He was nobody, and his words weren’t particularly the worst I could hear, or have heard, but I was starting to crumble. I cried. He knocked the breath, and happiness right out of me.

This nobody who probably forgot me as soon as he closed his mouth, became a nobody that I thought about everyday since. It’s been about two months, I guess. He helped release an anxiety that was gurgling away within. It’s not all consuming, it’s lingering. I know it’s there.

I realised last week that I was allowing this nobody to keep me where I am. At a standstill. I love exercising, but I only did it in the mornings when nobodys like him were still fast asleep. And sometimes, due to Hubby’s work schedule, I need to do whatever exercise I can, when I can. So some weeks meant I didn’t get to exercise at all.

I had a little Oprah Lightbulb Moment last week. I was allowing some Nobody to steal my sunshine. And it just will not do. No, it will just not do at all.

So I’ve been walking over the past week. And loving it. That morning sun just feeds my soul. I love seeing that sun rise on the horizon and everyone seems so happy and free at that hour.

I did forget to ask you how you were all doing on the Skinny for Santa challenge last week. So I’d love to hear how you’ve been going and what your goals are. My goal for this next week is to continue eating well and exercise as much as I can. I’ve been getting headaches, which I think are from dehydration so I am going to concentrate of getting lots of water.

So share away…

25 thoughts on “Steal My Sunshine.”

  3. By all means, set yourself the challenge, dare to be the person you want to be. But know that you are beautiful regardless and its got nothing to do with looks or weight. The most beautiful people shine from within…

  4. Oh Chantelle, I so know how that can knock you around. It's the reason I'm terrified to go back to the gym, after a similar comment from a similar tosspot.
    Have been laid low with a horrible tummy bug the last couple of days, but looking forward to getting back out for a big walk with the dog, and am borrowing an elliptical machine off my sister. Here I go!

  5. I totally fogot you were doing the “Skinny for Santa”-I made my own personal vow to become a “Holiday Hottie”.

    That guy was a jerk, a shallow, self loathing, low self-esteem, has no real friends and needs to go back under the rock he crawled out from jerk!

  6. What a numnut that guy is. The thing is, he has to live with himself, all day every day, with such a mean-spirited inconsiderate personality. Whereas someone like you Chantelle, brings love, and beauty, and light to yourself, your loved ones and us! It's only been such a short time since I've seen your blog, but I now visit every day, because your words and pics bring such sunshine to MY life. Elise x

  7. Chantelle, that's horrible!! What a dickhead. I bet he only said it because he's insecure about his own small willy or something. It's always those teeny tiny comments that shatter you the most. Good on you for taking the high road and doing your morning walks!

    Me? My health and fitness goal for the week is to stop eating so much crap. Too many birthdays = too much cake.

  8. Are there really people that rude out there? Oh my Lord, I think I would have sucker punched the asshole. I know that there are in fact rude people, but I have never run across anyone that rude for absolutely no rhyme or reason. That just infuriates the hell out of me. Screw that asshole. You seem like an absolutely beautiful person from here!!

  9. my goodness, what a vile human. and what an amazing person you are to be able to cut through crap like that and turn it into something positive.
    I don't have any particular goals but wanted to cheer all you ladies on. Maybe next time I'll have the energy!

  10. Bless your socks, you are fabulous.

    How dare that nasty, nasty 'nobody' hurt you in such a way. He isn't worth one of your tears.

    Rise up! You have so much going for you, so much more than that nobody will ever have. xx

  12. Oh that's horrible Chantelle, good on you for your Oprah light bulb moment though! Don't let them get you down!

    I'm in on the Skinny for Santa. Have been doing Lite n Easy for a little while now and trying to pick up on the exercise. Had a week off though just because I was disorganised! So, half a kilo lost so far – 3 by Christmas would be great! I'm going to focus on exercise, and trying to curb my desire for sweet treats this week 🙂

  13. I have been reading you blog for some time and agree that you are massive;
    – your love for your family is massive
    – your massive talent at photography
    – your massive talent at writing
    – your massive ability to inspire with your words
    – your profile photo shows a massive smile

  14. Oh Chantelle, that is a horrible story, and I know exactly how it would have hurt so much! It is always the insignificant ones that make us feel the worst, and like you say he would not have had another thought of you, yet I bet you can still see every detail of his face – well just give that slimy face a great big punch and never think of him again, think instead of that beautiful Lacey and how she only sees her beautiful Mummy, the one person who is her whole world, that is who needs to shine through, and that is where you need to draw your motivation from to keep striving for your goals.
    I am on track for the Skinnier for Santa Challenge. Since you put the call out I have lost 3 kgs, (6 in total, and I want to get to 10 by christmas, so 4 kgs to go, and I have a weigh in today), so I am getting there. I told my 8 month old the other day that she will never know me as a “fat” Mum and I am going to keep my promise to her. xxx

  15. It makes me really sad to read that happened to you Telle. No one deserves to have the wind knocked out of them like that.

    You are such a beautiful woman, inside and out, so don't let anyone ever make you feel less so. You are stronger and mightier than that.

    Good to hear you are searching for your sunshine xx

  16. I love lightbulb moments like that – good for you coming to that realisation! I want to remind you though that you bring sunshine in to the lives of SO MANY of us and that makes you truly gorgeous! xo

  17. I still can't get over how rude that nobody was. I have had someone shout out from a car at me before telling me I was fat. I instantly broke down to tears and the rest of the day (probably week) was ruined for me.

    Skinny for santa is going alright for me – I have lost 1kg so that is always good – I am just so darned tired that I can't be bothered exercising so instead I am just concentrating on eating well.

  19. i love you sis. and i fucking hate that deadshit.

    did you know americans don't use the word shit so interchangebly like us? they don't know what a dead shit is.. come to think of it, isn't shit already dead? LIKE THAT GUY IF I SEE HIM!!!!

    i love you so much. if i could take those words back from that dead shits mouth i would.

    sorry! guttermouth aren't i! oops

    love youxxoxo miss you

    you are the most beautiful person i have ever or will ever know.

    sis xoxoxo

  20. I second what everyone has said!! You are fab and I hope you realise that. And I am pretty sure you could give some models a run for their money! XXXXX

  22. what a tool! imagine being him. imagine being married to him! imagine he was your boss and you had to deal with him everyday. imagine he was your son and you had to love him even though his attitude is revolting. oh! he needs some social rehabilitation.

  23. I'm so glad that you're not letting someone so small and petty knock you down! You are brilliant and one of my favourite reads- I'm so glad that you're standing strong in yourself!

  24. beautifully written, heartbreakingly close to home
    Ive never ever had a stranger call me names bacause of my weight but my family make up for that to be sure…..

    Im so glad this nobody is now powerless xxx

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