Not A Baby Any More.

I’m a helicopter parent. I’ll admit it. I am. I hover over Lacey for most of the day. I get anxious if she wants to play in her bedroom on her own. If I lose sight of her for a moment whilst we’re out, I freak out. Just the other day we were out and I couldn’t see her for a mere moment, and I panicked. I couldn’t breathe, I felt sick and I started calling out her name. She was two metres away from me. Behind something bigger than her. All that in just 20 seconds.

I knew sending her to Kindy was going to be hard. I also knew that she needed more than me and my helicopter parenting.

I woke early and as soon as I opened my eyes, I knew that it was K-day {Kindy Day}. I showered, dressed and then packed her little bag all as Lacey slept {including a little photo of Hubby, Lacey & I in the front pocket as Christie kindly suggested}.

I also took two Rescue Remedy lozenges and headed down to wake her up. She was so happy and unaware. I told her about Kindy and the friends she’d play with and all the things she could do like painting, pasting, reading, running, sliding and more.

She was excited and happy. I was anxious and nervous. We headed out to the car after getting ready and went on our way.

My heart raced as we drove along, but eventually we made it. We opened the big gate and walked inside. It all became quite a blur. I tried to make Lacey fall in love with the Kindy, all the while wanting to scoop her up and take her home. My heart told me that I should just have her at home with me. My mind told me that Kindy was good for her. I gave the teacher the look. The look that says ‘I’m leaving’.

And I did. I said goodbye. I told her I was coming back. She looked shocked. And she screamed.

It’s unnatural for me to leave her with people she doesn’t know. I felt like I was abandoning her. My heart was beating overtime and a lump formed in my throat. I glanced back at her whilst closing the gate. Big mistake. That look in her eyes brought tears to mine.

I got in the car and I sobbed.

I waited an hour before calling to check up on her. I listened carefully for any crying in the background. There wasn’t. They assured me that she was happy and settled.

I returned later that afternoon to collect her, and I peeked on her to see how she was interacting. She looked like she’d grown up a lot in just a matter of hours. She was a big girl.

She was sitting happily, playing and talking with her friends.

I was relieved. We survived. And we both had smiles on our faces.

PS. She also managed to bring home a nice little case of slap cheek too. Joy.

1 thought on “Not A Baby Any More.”

  1. Oh Telle. I did the same as you the first time I dropped Carter at daycare (and called Dani from Danimezza while sobbing in my car). It does get easier, and they DO have a fantastic time. It's just so much harder for us! Big hugs for you both.

    Oh, BTW, loving the font change too!

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