‘m not a perfect parent. I don’t know a perfect parent, to be honest. I have friends that I look up to, who I wish I was more like. They seem to always speak in a kind voice, always saying the right words, always cooking Organic good food, organising age appropriate craft activities for their children and their houses look immaculate.
Last week my Big Sis was getting ready to go out. She was putting on lipstick, and painting her nails. Lacey was mesmerised and wanted to play Big Girl too and requested {in her own little way} to have her nails painted.
So we painted them. Big Sis was painting hers black, but we thought we’d steer clear of Goth Lacey for now and try a shade of pink. She loved them. She pointed her toes this way and that. She danced. She didn’t want to wear shoes. Those babies weren’t being covered up.
In such a happy, blissful, safe moment I felt guilty. She was a day short of being one and a half. I know that’s far too young for any make-up. I know she wasn’t doing it for any other reason than to be just like her Aunt. I still felt a little guilty, and non-perfect-parent-material.
Of course the next day news hit that children are being targeted by stores and media in an over-sexualised fashion. The article is titled Little Girls Are The New Sex Objects. And then more guilt set in.
Lacey probably won’t have her nails painted again for years to come, and I don’t imagine she’ll own a lipsmacker before she’s four. I think there are problems when bras, make-up and other teen-appropriate items are marketed for children. I know there is no harm in little ones wanting to be like their Aunts or Mamas. It’s only natural for them to be like us.
I realise that we have such influence over our little ones. We are role models. Everyday, not just when we want to be. And I also know if I’m not feeling guilty about this, then I’ll find something else to feel guilty about. We’re not perfect. We’re mothers. And with being a mother, usually comes Mother Guilt. It’s part and parcel.
What do you feel guilty about as a parent?
I sure know what you mean about Mother Guilt. I wrote a post about it a while back:
http://ishandchi.blogspot.com/2009/01/mother-guilt.html
I don't see anything wrong with painting her toes to be like her aunt and it sounds as though she had lots of fun. That can't be a bad thing can it?
Did you hear the news about children under the age of 2 should not watch any tv at all? I sometimes have the tv on in the background and my son will at times stop playing whatever game we're playing and watch a commercial that's caught his attention.
I feel so guilty about that now I've had the tv switched off since.
I know what you mean. Petal loves watching me apply my make-up. Before bubs I was a make-up artist, so it's kind of my thing, but it's hard because I don't want her to think she has to wear make-up, just because I do. Some days I will let her wear a smear of clear lip gloss (more often I give her a dab of Pawpaw ointment and she is equally thrilled)and a couple of times I have let her wear a pale pink shade of nail polish on her toes, which she adores. It's hard to deny a princess, I know.
No guilt here as not a mother, but honestly, I don't see the problem with a bit of nail polish or lipstick/balm at a young age. It's innocent and cute.
I was getting off plane from Munich in New York and little kid, maybe 2, spoke to me. She spoke German I guess, so I didn't know what. Her dad translated. Apparently she wanted some of whatever it was I'd just put on my lips. So I pulled it back out, smeared some on her finger, and apply away she went. Cute. Very cute.
I don't think there is anything wrong with painting her nails – epsecially if she enjoyed it.
I constantly have mother guilt – currently it is because she has a fungus and I feel bad that I didn't pick it up earlier. It is never ending!
Not being able to provide all that I would like to. But, that is more in financial terms. I do feel good knowing I am loving her as much as possible!
Go get some piggy paint – and fear not! Have fun.
It is hard not to feel guilty about everything. I feel guilty for leaving them at daycare. I feel guilty Snoopy has eczema & blame myself for not trying to breastfeed more when he was an infant.
I don't think there's anything wrong with painting her toenails. I remember taking a class in college where we talked about this how girls (after they're around 4 years old) are starting to get into princesses and stuff based on TV, media, role models they have in their life.
telle don't feel guilty about a little nail polish all girls love to have their toe nails painted no matter what age….. it's fun and it sure looks pretty!!!!! All the kids i look after often ask to have nail polish and i never say no as their faces just light up and they are 2 year olds…how can you say no!!!!!
I think all us mum's feel guilt about something or other it comes with the job unfortunately
your doing a wonderful job as a mum, lacey is a happy and gorgeous little girl so keep doing whatever it is you are doing!!! xx
Nothing wrong with abit of girly fun! Dont feel guilty at all.
I paint my nails all the time and Hannah is always buzzing around me putting out a finger and I usually paint one finger nail and shes happy. 🙂
Hannah also sits in the spa with me and we put hair treatments on and she plays while I sit back and read a magazine.
Its really all in good fun! 🙂
I love the pic of Lacey's little feet too!!
that is the biggest crock of shit about Lacey not being able to wear nail polish. She is being creative and exploring different things and i think that is totally healthy and just so, stinkin cute. there are lots of studies that show it's so important to let babies explore all different parts of their personalities, to understand what there identity is.
you are the best mum in the world. i've never heard you NOT speak nice to your beautiful bubba.
love you
sis
Oh gosh, I think putting a bit of nail polish on a little girl is totally ok!! Relax, there are years and years of guilt to come when you make actual mistakes with them 🙂
You sound like a lovely mum x