It’s kinda a big deal.

IMG_6203

This week Lacey started big school. It’s kinda a big deal.

The morning of the ‘big’ day I mentioned on Instagram that I was nervous. I had one comment from a person saying they didn’t understand why people {mums/parents} cry, and that attachment issues can’t be good for the kids.

Lacey was so ready. I wanted her to go, because she was just so ready and she loves school. I love her, but I don’t want to hold her back. I was filled with mixed emotions about her going; relief because the school holidays had felt loooooong, and I wasn’t offering enough stimulation to keep her happy and entertained, and sadness because big school is a big step, and I know from nannying that they just get older at an exceedingly fast rate from here on in.

Why do people cry? Because they love and care for them, I guess. I didn’t cry. I should have. I was a ball of emotion, rolling about waiting to burst. She looked so cute in her uniform, she would have worn it every day of the school holidays if I let her. She wore those new school shoes as much as she could, well until they got all scuffed and we had to start hiding them.

When I started school I was an anxious mess, I just wanted to stay with my Ma. My little sister went to school for one day and thought that was it. She thought she was done. So she cried so many days afterwards. Lacey skipped in, got a buddy and happily went off and started drawing. She’s confident, happy, and raring to go. Her buddy asked her, “Do you want to say goodbye to your mum?” She shook her head and started playing. She was so ready.

She came home with a handful of drawings, one was that which she’d done with her buddy, “See that thing there,” she said cheekily, “I made my buddy draw some rainbow poop.”

That’s my kid. That’s my big kid.

Comments

  1. Kimmish says

    I didn’t cry 10 years ago either – my Gracie just said ‘bye Mom, love ya, and she was off. She was so ready, & I was a mass of blubbering tears just waiting to be shed. But afterward, when I picked her up, she was so shiny, happy and brimming with excitement, it made all of my tears go away. My big kid is still that way now in high school. Your big kid is confident, bright and shiny (from the sound of it) — what a blessing to have a Mom who helped her get that way. Good job!

  2. says

    I cry not because I don’t want them to go but because the milestone is emotional. I also cry at the end of the year, thanking their teacher. It’s who I am and nothing to do with attachment issues. I’m so damn proud. x

  3. says

    So glad to hear all went smoothly. Rainbow poop haha.
    My husband tells me I must be emotionally empty because I didn’t even cry the first day I dropped my baby off to daycare. It probably helped that she didn’t cry (and never has thank god). But, you know, I cried when I found out I was pregnant with her so I think they cancel out.

  4. Little Munch says

    It is such a big deal and we should be allowed to cry, our little creations are entering the big wide world to fend for themselves. Isn’t is kind weird if we don’t feel like crying?

  5. Kate says

    ohhhhh dear!
    My youngest started Kindy last week. He cried. I cried. Only on the first day and only after I had left him … ok. I lied. I also had a quiet little cry on the second day too ;)
    He has been back 3 days since {he goes 5 days a fortnight} with less tears and more smiles each time.
    I know why he cried. He misses me. He told me so. I know why I cried. I fear someone will be mean to my baby. I fear someone will hurt him, I fear someone will bully him. I am nervous he will be lonely. It’s really hard to let your baby out into the world and trust they will be ok. But he was soooo very ready!! It fills me with tremendous joy to see him enjoying Kindy! So many emotions! And emotional = tears for me. Sometimes I am filled so full of love and joy that it spills over and out my eyes :)
    All I can do is show him how to be a good, kind person and hope that is what he receives in return. And trust. And be thankful every time a new friend gives him a wave or a they share friendly word :)

  6. Helen Jaman says

    Its such a big deal ! I’m about to turn 43 and I remember my first day of school so vividly…I cried and chased my mum and clung to her leg…clearly I didn’t want to go…my son (now 14) was so ready…I on the other hand was so not…I was strong..I had to be…needless to say the memory that remains now is he loved it and carried on loving it…I however had my husband take the day off work and console my outbursts of sobbing for the remainder of his first day of prep … pathetic some may think … he is my ‘only one’ and I knew from that moment life was going to be different … a little like when they find about about Santa …never again will we have those times … I wish Lacey all the best in these exciting years and I hope you are coping better than I did Chantelle !! xx

  7. Sandie says

    It doesn’t matter how ready they are or how much you know they are ready. Once they take that step into big school they are no longer your babies, you no longer are the only main influence in their lives. Now they will see life through other people’s lives and begin forming their own real opinions. Most mothers see this..and know even if this is the way it is meant to happen, doesn’t mean we want it to :)
    I am glad Lacey was ready and happy to go off on her own without her Mama but just a little sad with you that your little girl is on the way to being all grown up !

  8. Chantel says

    I didn’t cry either. But it is a big deal as we are unsure if the teacher will love and nurture our children and if they will see them for the amazing little humans that we do xx

  9. shoppegirls says

    Starting school is a huge milestone for you as a parent and the child themselves. The children just plod along moving on with each new day tackling all that is in front of them. I do not think it is the fac that your child is starting school it is just that they are starting a new segment of their life and getting bigger and learning more all the time. The world can be a wonderful and sometimes scary place. Each step they take to becoming closer to being on there own pulls on the heart strings. No matter what happens us as parents will shed a tear or have a little moment to reflect their life prior to the next big step.
    I did not cry straight away with either of my girls, it took awhile to sink in and then I fell apart.

    Huge hugs to all the parents with little people starting.

    I have one starting college/uni and another in year 10. xx

  10. Tanya Travers says

    No need to feel bad that you didn’t ‘t cry. I never cried with my own two starting school, lots of tears along the 13 years of their schooling at those very proud Mumsie moments! As a Prep teacher for most of my teaching career I always have a box of tissues handy – not just for snotty noses but for teary mums and dads! Enjoy your freedom from 9 till 3.30 knowing Lacey will be enjoying her school days!

  11. Lauren says

    I think its unhealthy to not show your children emotion (if you are crying, that is)! I think it really helps to walk through sadness, anxiety, stress etc with them so A) they can see it’s completely ok to have emotions, and B) it’s a great opportunity to give them the processing tools to cope with emotion! Who says we need to suck it up these days?! End rant :) Congrats on joining the big school club :)

  12. Karen says

    When my girl went to school for the first time (2,5 years ago now).
    I took her to the class, hang around for a bit. She said to me: it’s okay mum, you can go. I went home and started crying for minutes.
    School is a big step… school is not only important because they start to learn reading, writing etc. They starts school at 4 (in Holland) and when they are done, they will be 12. Every year I see her change and grown up a little bit… Hell ya school is a big step…

  13. Tiia says

    I think it might be something that you can only fully understand when you have your own kids… And it’s not about attachment issues, but the emotional situation, and everyone handles those differently..

    I’m feeling somewhat detached from everything that happens with my hubby’s kid, as there’s not a deep emotional connection there.. but in some situations it helps in our home for me to be a voice of reason when hubby is at loss with the girl stuff and gets frustrated from all the mixed emotions etc. :)

  14. Michelle W says

    I cried the first day of daycare, after I left my 6 month old girl (when I wanted to stay home with her instead). I was nervous and emotional (for my baby) on the first day of school, but I was determined to stay strong so that she could be strong. We both were strong. Both my girls are strong, independent girls (11 & 6). That doesn’t stop me getting emotional over the big milestones! Your Lacey sounds like such a confident girl! :-) I remember my own first day of school (about 40 years ago). I missed the first week because I had mumps. Then I spent about 6 months attached to my teacher’s skirt. I’m pretty sure my girls are much more confident than I was, lol!

  15. Maxabella says

    I think setting our kids off to school is one of the hardest parenting milestones of alll. There they go, off to live life and we are left with so many ‘what ifs’ and ‘what nexts’. And our greatest fear: what if the world doesn’t love our sweeties as much as we do.

    Lacey seems to gave taken it all in her stride – and so gas her ma! x

  16. Linda Thompson Gebelein says

    When my youngest went to kindergarten I did shed a tear or two, but I simply reminded myself that my job as a parent is to help my kids grow up (and they did—they’re 26 and 20 now). I celebrated rather than mourned all the events that took place in that process.

  17. Ann Brennan says

    I don’t know why people say stupid things. Of course we cry. We love our kids and each new step reminds us that they will one day be leaving our homes for good. Yes, that is what we are preparing them for but it doesn’t make it any easier to imagine the day it will happen.

  18. Em says

    It is a big deal! I was especially anxious the first day because my son is a little special. He’s loving big school, though and has an awesome buddy, so I’m no longer worried. I’m loving the school work he brings home, too! x

  19. Bree says

    It is emotional! Number four of five started kinder this year and I bawled once I got home. I appreciate more and more everyday how precious those pre school years are. There are no “attachment issues” I’m just kind of sensitive and I love my kids

  20. Dina says

    I was a hot mess when I dropped my child off at kindergarten. It wasn’t that she wasn’t going to do great and be a bright and studious child, it was that for the first five years I was the primary care giver and now I was nervously having to trust that someone else is just as capable as I to take care of her needs. She did great and we had a wonderful year but the whole thing was very emotional for me.

  21. Charlotte Cornes says

    My oldest daughter starts school in September, I well up just thinking about it now! But I know she is ready…but she’s my baby! :-)

  22. Charlotte Cornes says

    My oldest starts school in September, I well up already just thinking about it. But she is beyond ready…will miss her, she is my baby!

Leave a Reply