have a little confession to make: I am flawed. I am human. I have tantrums.
I had one last week, in fact.
It was Sunday morning. The sun was shining. I was high on life. I was child-free, and husband-free for the morning. A very rare moment of solitude. And I had the Sunday papers to read. Life doesn’t get better.
An email arrived in my inbox from Pro Blogger. He mentioned that surveying your readers was a great way to get inside the minds of your audience. It’s something that I had thought about doing for a while, and when he linked to a website that hosted them… I thought, why not?
I put together some questions to ease my curious mind. Nothing too difficult. I think there were ten questions all up {you guys would know, you answered them} and set up a post directing everyone to the survey. And in the responses flowed.
Why a survey? Why not? As a blogger it’s hard to tell what everyone likes to read about, or look at. I often wonder how posts are received. Comments are a great indicator. Surveys are another method.
By Sunday afternoon there had been so many responses that I had to start a whole new survey {with the same questions} because the first survey was full and couldn’t take any more on. It was great that everyone was participating.
As I read through the responses I became disheartened. I did ask everyone to be honest, and everyone was. One part of me appreciated it, but one part of me was a little bit hurt. I had no idea that I would be so sensitive. No idea at all. I didn’t see it coming.
I was so focused on the negative comments that I couldn’t see all the lovely ones. I had a Hissy Fit. It was all in my head, mind you. I’ll show those haters, I thought, I just won’t blog anymore. Take that.
I emailed my go-to-girl and told her what I thought. I called a friend. I mentioned it to Hubby. That was it. There would be no more blog.
And then I saw the light {with a little nudging from go-to-girl, friend and Hubby}. It reminded me of so many beautiful quotes I’ve read about being so focused on the negative that we’re unable to see all the good stuff. The negative comments wouldn’t have even made up 1% of the responses… all the rest were beautiful, constructive and complimentary.
So thank you so much to everyone {yeah, even the haters – I know you were only hating parts, and that’s okay} for answering the questions. I learnt a lot. But as a few wise people said in the survey {in their own way}: This is your blog. Don’t change a thing. It doesn’t matter what we like or don’t like, all that matters is that you make it yours. We come back because it’s you.
A few people mentioned that they’d like to know the results. So here are some statistics, as well as some comments that I’d like to respond to:
♥ Most readers have been visiting for a few months {44.4%}, a few for over a year {35.4%}, a handful for a couple of weeks {7.1%}, some lovely supporters from the very first post {6.1%}, and some readers who were brand spanking new {2%}.
♥ A whopping 96% of you all visit daily. {Hello to you all. Thanks for the love}.
♥ What do you love on Fat Mum Slim? There were a lot of responses saying everything, I love it all, and then there were the more specific: family, photos, motherhood, letters to Lacey, mushy posts, when I talk about lack of sleep, photos, life, when I write about our adventures, shopping and photos, to name just a few. I think you guys like photos, eh?
A few responses were:
♥ I think the combination of all the topics is what keeps is so interesting. One minute we are learning about you and the next we are accidentally learning about ourselves.
♥ I really, really love your positive messages – they remind me of the good things in life.
♥ The style you write is very fresh and relatable.
♥ What do you like least on Fat Mum Slim? The majority of responses stated that you like the mix as it is. A few topics that were mentioned that weren’t favourites were: craft, shopping, weight, motherhood, the question posts, everyday everybody, when I ask what you did on the weekend, quotes, posts with items that are too expensive, wordy posts, corny posts, weekend sign offs, flower for your Friday posts, when I’m too personal, family stuff and Letters to Lacey.
A few responses were:
♥ The one question posts are a waste of my time.
♥ Everyday Everybody – I really want to enjoy it, but I don’t.
♥ Family stuff… and personal weight loss. I love weight loss tips, but sometimes it’s a little too personal.
♥ Nothing. It’s the perfect balance as it is.
♥ I then asked you, What would you like to see more of? Some of your responses were: fashion stores, fashion tips, style, craft, photography, life, latest buys, food, beauty, more content, writing, decorating, etsy finds, home projects, reader challenges, more opinion, mummy fashion, everything, more about Chantelle, mothering, more about sleep deprivation, everyday everybody, gift ideas, photos, children, inspiration, giveaways.
A few responses were:
♥ Fashion. Your posts on a couple of stores & websites have been almost life changing. I am a size 16/18 and find it hard to buy nice clothes. I now have a decent wardrobe again – all thanks to you! {so glad to hear – Chantelle}.
♥ Nothing. The reason why your blog is enjoyable is because you are sharing your thoughts and feelings about things as they come… & that sharing is a big part of you.
♥ I do like the often indulgent recipes – however considering we are all dieting – how about some diet friendly indulgent recipes? {Challenge accepted, thanks – Chantelle}
♥ I then asked, What would like to see less of? Some answers were: high end fashion, everyday everybody, mum stuff, questions, exercise, pictures, clothes, quotes, challenges for people losing weight, but most said nothing, they liked the mix as it is.
Some responses were:
♥ I think there is often an overdose of Lacey posts.
♥ I’d like less cute kid photos. One cute kid looks much the same as the next to me.
♥ I generally skip ones that don’t have any ‘news’… the ones that I, myself would call ‘corny’. They kind of annoy me a little. I’m sorry.
And then a few comments that I would like to comment on:
♥ Everyday Everybody is good, but the questions in it suck. They don’t really mean anything.
Everyday Everybody seems to be hit and miss for everyone. It was pretty even, half of you loved it, and half you didn’t. Personally, I love them. I like learning about about other people. I know that the questions are odd, and quirky… and that’s one of the reasons I love it. It has the person being interviewed really thinking about their responses, and readers don’t know what to expect. Everyday Everybody will be hanging around on Wednesdays. I’ll try and throw something in on Wednesdays {every now and then} to appease those who aren’t so fond of Everyday Everybody.
♥ I like hearing about your life + family, but sometimes it’s a little too personal.
I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable by the things you’ve read here. I only share about 2% of my life on this blog. There is a whole other 98% that I live and keep to myself, and special to my family. I’m mindful of what I share, and what I don’t. I’m not sure what particular posts you’re referring too… but it is something that I will also be mindful of in the future.
♥ You do some lovely giveaways, but I’m not sure if you actually need them. People read if you are interesting.
I think of giveaways as a whole big squishy group hug. Giveaways make everyone feel good. They allow the creators of the goods to promote their products, readers have a chance of acquiring some goodies at no cost to them and I love doing them. I don’t do them that often, but when I do I really enjoy them.
And some of the comments that made me smile were:
♥ I just keep nodding my head all the time. You bring a little sunshine to my day.
♥ Reading your blog is some much needed time out from my day.
♥ Your blog is one of the things that makes my heart sing.
♥ I really enjoy your blog. It’s so light, and bright and it makes me smile.
♥ I love that you make me laugh out loud!
♥ I love your positivity and your outlook. The world needs more Chantelles.
I realise that not every reader can be satisfied by every post created here. I know what it feels like to see a new post on a blog, and realise that it’s a little bit mediocre and less that I had hoped for. It’s like being disappointed with a magazine. You just have to hope that the next issue is more you, more for you to relate to, more up your alley. I guess that’s life. We all like different things, and that’s what makes us.. us.
It’s much the same as chocolate. We all like different types, flavours, brands… or perhaps you just don’t like chocolate at all. By the way… Lindt was a clear favourite amongst you all. You’ve got great taste.
Oh, and if you mentioned that you had a blog, but didn’t leave a link… please comment below with it so I can come and visit you.
As for the giveaway for those that responded to the survey I will do it later today, as this is a mammoth post as is.
Thank you all so much for everything. It was a great learning experience. I appreciate you all taking some time out for me. xx
Hey telle
I am sorry the survey's upset you but as one person said it is your blog and if people don't don't like it they don't have to keep coming back.
Personally I love it all, your style of writing is wonderful, those letters to lacey make me wish I had done the same for my two terrors and I can never get enough photo's.
So keep up the beautiful work and do whatever makes you happy as that is what this blog should be about about!!!!!
Remember your word of the year??????
Isn't it suppose to be all about YOU!!!!!
xx
Wow wee, i'm a first timer so clearly i feel like i've entered into a conversation half way. I don't quite get why people are mean on blogs, what on earth are they like in real life?? I can only imagine & never hope to meet them. I guess you asked for it in the honest survey, alas, if they don't like things, don't look?? It's not exactly difficult to click on the X & shut down a blog off your computer. Was your final conclusion “you can't make everyone happy??” Bit tough on the 'every child image looks the same' gosh i hope they don't look at my blog & see my 4 children, how awfully boring for them!! Even my twins don't look alight!! Sending you sunshine & happiness, love Posie
I find there are always haters when someone is doing well. My hope is that you remember only the positive answers – Your blog is truly wonderful as it is. Most of us love everything about it (you wouldn't have nearly 500 followers if we didn't) As a mum I find it a joy spending my small amount of spare time in your world and smiling because I can relate to so much. XXX
@Bee: Thank you. Thanks for the reminder that this year is about me. It's easy to forget. xx
@Posie: This is a very rare post, and unlike any of my usual posts. I do hope you come back again. xx
@LuluFrouFrou: Thank you so much lovely. That means the world to me. xx
I'm glad you posted this .. I read it in Google Reader, and wondered what happened to it.
I'm also glad you're sticking around, pretty. We love you! x
I'm so glad you didn't leave us chantelle! Where would I be without my dose of Fatmumslim?!
helllo fatmumslim, first of all I LOVE your blog! I've been coming in for almost a year, almost everyday! on my favourites list, you are number 2… I love the Lacey posts the most, I love the letters to Lacey, I love the photos of Lacey, I love hearing about your experiences as a mum (I am yet to be a mum, hopefully one day! soon! please make it soon!) ummm I love the recipes and the interior design ideas, I would love to hear more about your home furnishing inspirations, I have tried a few of your recipes, I love hearing about your fitness plans and progress, hmmm what else??? I dont think I'd change anything, like you said its your blog! and we wouldnt all keep coming back if we didnt love it so! So thank you for being you and sharing your experiences with us all, your triumphs and tribulations, your beautiful baby girl, the love you have for your husband… its all what keeps me coming back! Lots of love and gratitude, mia xoxox
Hi Chantelle,
I am sorry to hear that there were some rude responses in your survey. I took the opportunity to stop lurking, and hope that any feedback was helpful.
Your blog is beautiful, and I really don't think you should ever limit personal bits or try to censor yourself for those readers- its YOUR blog, and YOU that people keep coming back for.
Keep being you!
Katie
Chantelle, I feel sad that the responses made you sad. I hope I wasn't tooo honest and made you feel down. I love your blog, just love it. You're not at all too personal, I want MORE of you! More of Lacey!
@Kahlee: Thanks. I wasn't sure about posting, and am still uneasy about it. I don't want to seem unappreciative and push those away who gave negative feedback. They're not in the wrong. I asked for hoenst feedback, and I got that. So hopefully they see what I am trying to say.
@T'lia: Thanks a million. xx
@Mia: Thank you for the feedback. I hope you do have a baby, and soon. xx
@Katie: So true. Thank you. xx
@Blythe: Thank you sweetness. xx
Hi Chantelle,
I was so upset reading that you were upset. People can be cruel and you are such a giving, sunny person and how can anyone not send the love back your way??? Most of all PLEASE KEEP BLOGGING. I know it must be hard to come up with new posts every day, and it must almost seem like a burden at times. But so many of us cherish our littles visits here to give us some smiles and a break from our busy day. We appreciate it so much so bring it on!!
I like this bit from your post:
“This is your blog. Don't change a thing. It doesn't matter what we like or don't like, all that matters is that you make it yours. We come back because it's you.”
Agree wholeheartedly. I love it. xo
Hi Chantelle, your blog is beautiful, uplifting and so full of love. I visit here everyday and I love reading everything you write, especially the Lacey ones, all the pics and anything about motherhood. I sooooooo would love to be a mum soon and everytime I read your letters to Lacey, I think how I will love to do something similar when I have a baby. Please, don't change a thing, you are perfect as you are. Jade xx
Thanks for posting the responses, it really is interesting. Especially since a lot of the things people love, some people don't.
I love the whole thing. Even if I don't read a specific post on the day it is posted, I may end up reading something that relates to it later on, then go back to it.
You and your blog makes me smile. And Lacey. She is just the most adorable thing ever
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I have been following your blog for a while now and I admit I was quite surprised that you got that response. Hey, I'm all for constructive critism..but c'mon!! I love reading your blog and hearing about your journey..I love the little conversations about Lacey's hair..and I lived in Syd for a year so I hold a special place in my heart.
I hope you can move on from the hissy fit..and remember that you have some postive followers!
Hi,
Firstly, just want to apologise that I didn't answer your survey because I believe that you put into your blog what you want to say, not what others want to say.
Your blog is wonderful, and was one of the first that I came across. And the bit I do enjoy the most is what is happening in your life, the normal things that occur, the challenges of being a woman, a wife, a mum and a human being in this world – keep up the good work. You bring a smile to many people's faces everyday (and for those that don't enjoy your blog, well they shouldn't read it). It is about 'YOU' so please keep talking about 'YOU'.
By the way, your letters to Lacey are beautiful (I wish I had done this more regularly with my children – what a beautiful keepsake she will have when she is older and is faced will all the challenges that her life with give her).
I must admit that I didn;t fill in the survey, and now I wish I did, because I would have told you that i LOVE it. I have begun to check it everyday. I honestly can't say there is another blog like it. I like that!
I have a blog, but I don't put enough work into it. For the moment I am putting it on hold. However if there was any blog that I would want to blend into mine, it would be yours. I like the quotes, the questions, I like you sharing your weight struggles as I too struggle.
Please don't stop. It;s yours, it's you, and that's all that maters!
I didn't do the survey because I didn't want to give you negative feedback….I love you blog and you don't need to change it at all….i did think when I downloaded the survey and decided not to fill it in that it was hard to fill it in without saying something negative and I didn't want to!…so hence didn't fill it in….so maybe bear that in mind when you read the responses. '
BTW I would love some of your nanny escapes written up….change the names to protect the innocent!! But i am sure you could write a book with all your stories!!! LOL
Totally loving your blog so keep going everyone …..
Some time ago you wrote about not letting people 'steal your sunshine'. It's a phrase I often remind myself of – (so much so, that the boyf references fatmumslim whenever I say it!)
One of the many gifts you have is to shine light into others' lives (complete strangers just like me!). Chantelle, your blog is so beautiful and compelling and gorgeous – it's a reflection of YOU. That's why I keep coming back, and will continue to do so.
Elise xo
I LOVE your blog and think you are so generous and beautiful with your sharing of your self, words, photos and thoughts.
Try to remember that 99% of us LOVE your blog! Also, a survey pushes people to scratch their brain for answers to questions sometimes so in answering questions about what they don't like, they may be just putting down their least fave parts rather than actual things they dislike.
I'm so glad you're not quitting!!!!!
You are a brave soul putting yourself on the line and we appreciate it so much!
xo
This is my absolute favourite blog. Not even kidding. I'm on here every day, twice a day without fail. Don't change a thing. x
I am just going to echo your sentence: 'It doesn't matter what we like or don't like, all that matters is that you make it yours. We come back because it's you'
I love your blog, it makes me laugh, cringe (with motherly affinity) and smile. It is just an eye full of sunshine on my blogroll-please oh please don't give up on us!!
And personally, I love hearing about your life {and can't get enough of Lacey!} and I appreciate how honest you are. Just keep being you and we will keep on reading and cheering you on.
Much love xx
Hmm. Looks like my comment yesterday didn't publish. I'll repeat it:
Don't listen to those nay-sayers who criticise your pics of Lacey. She's the centre of your life and as such should feature highly in a blog such as this (I mean, the hint's in the title: Fat MUM slim).
Also, I think she is beautiful and the pics and stories of her brighten my day immensely. I'm not a kid person as such, so you can take that as a ringing endorsement.
Oh Chantelle, I'm so sorry the survey upset you. I felt bad that I couldn't give you anything more than “it's all great! keep doing what you are doing!”
I struggle with the same thing on my blog at times. Do I make it personal? Should I post this or that? What will others think? It took me nearly 2 hours to finally post what I wrote last night. In the end, after speaking with my husband, I decided I should write from the heart and be honest about what I am thinking and feeling. I was never like this. It used to be easy to post! But I realised that if you aren't keeping your blog real then what point is there of having one? What will make people connect to YOU.
You have a voice and a right to express it in your own unique way and it is your unique way that makes those of us who follow love you and your blog x
Chantelle, what you did was a brave thing- how many of us ask our others- whether be friends or acquaintances what they like/dislike about our lives?
Thank you for posting this, and continue to post as I said in your survey, your blog is like my novel that I sit down to read when breastfeeding my little one!
Keep it up, good on you for continuing on, and thank you for doing so and for letting me be entertained for another day!
Kate
Funnily enough what people have said they don't like, I love about your blog! How can people not like the everyday everybody – you and I must just be nosey 🙂 nothing wrong with that!
And as for personal things like your weight loss – it's called FAT MUM SLIM (for those that didn't get that up the top there) DER!
I love your pics of Lacey but I also find your photography artistic not just 'another cute kid pic'. I don't read all the letters to Lacey but that is for personal reasons, not because I don't like them.
I would like to jump on the “don't change a thing, I love it” bandwagon.
xx
Hi! I just wanted to reiterate (because I see others have said the same thing), that this is your blog and your blog alone. That is why it is a great blog. You keep doing your thing! I love it, and I for one will continue reading 🙂
i love love love your blog!
it is a blog about motherhood and weight loss and all things that inspire you! please dont change a thing… if you did – it wouldnt be your blog anymore and i wouldnt find it nearly as interesting…
my fave bits are 'letter to lacey' or any other post about her with all your gorgeous photos. i miss you guys and its a chance to get a little sneak peek at what your up to so i dont miss out on too much.
just keep doing what your doing – you rock!!!
rowe x
Hello =) I've never commented before, but I've been reading for a little while and I just wanted to chime in and say that I love everything! And even if I didn't–it's your blog, you should write about what you want. Personally I think your little girl is adorable, so don't stop the photos, and I love reading your Letters to Lacey posts. They're always so touching and gorgeous. xx Tara
I'm a new fan and I love what you do with your blog. It's always interesting, diverse, personal (which I like) and very real. You're happy, you're sad. And that's completely awesome.
I was so inspired I bought your e-book. And it's great. Full of wonderful ideas.
Keep blogging just the way you are, and I look forward to coming back! xx