Brought to you by Blackmores.
When’s the last time you were bored? Or the last time you had nothing to do? Seriously, when was it?
Because I can’t remember. Yesterday a friend shared on Facebook that she had ticked everything off her to-do list and felt oddly bored and slightly scared that she had nothing to do for the first time since she was a teenager.
I pondered this over breakfast this morning. I’d been up since 3:46am, an early start so that I could fit everything into my day {around feeding little Luella, and tending to her every need} because I’ve quickly realised that it’s near impossible to fit everything into just one day. Aussie mums {and women, or all people for that matter} do a lot of juggling these days. So much more than our parents did, and more than their parents did too. Times have changed, and the pace at which we live is kerazy.
Blackmores knows what it’s like to be an Aussie Mama, or a woman during pregnancy, so their products are specifically formulated for our Australian lifestyle. They’ve also created a site called ‘Mums like you’ so that you can join a community and chat with other mums or mums-to-be, but also purchase products, ask a naturopath {I love that!} or join their sweet Instagram feed.
I’m going to put my hand up and say that I’m positively hopeless at taking things off my plate. I can’t delegate and when people try to help, I feel guilty and just tell them I’ll do it myself. You know who is good at taking things off their plates? Men. Well, I can’t speak for all men, but I can speak about what I know… my husband. I don’t think he gets the guilts. If someone asks him to do something, and he doesn’t want to do it, or can’t fit it into his day… he just says no.
Who’d have thunk it? Just saying no. If someone asks me to do something, sometimes I’ll say no, but more often than not, I’ll say yes, and then reshuffle everything, increase my stress levels and regret not having the guts to put my foot down. Does anyone else do this?
But I’m going to make me a priority. I’m going to take of myself, because like they say on the plane – you’ve got to put on your own oxygen mask first before your kids. Us mamas need to be in good shape to take care of the little people, and the rest of the stuff in our lives. Here’s how we can all do it:
♥ Just say no. I used to be a ‘yes’ person then I got a bit ballsy and now I’ve reverted back to the ‘yes’ person. I know it’s OK to say no. I know people in my life would hate for me to do things I don’t want to do. So, no it is.
♥ Be OK with disappointing people. Yep. I’m sorry but with putting yourself first means sometimes people will be disappointed. That’s OK.
♥ Be short. The nice and fluffy emails are going to have to go down to being just a few sentences long.
♥ Realise having it all isn’t the bees knees. Nobody can really have it all, and trying to have it all and do it all comes at a cost {our sanity!} so let’s quit and be happy with what we have.
♥ Get your list on. Yep write a list of everything you need to do so that it’s out of your head. Then cross out the things that are essential. And just choose a small number of things to do each day.
♥ Just escape it all. This is one thing I’ve learned; if you just get in the car, and head to the beach {or where ever your happy place is} and forget it all… the world doesn’t end. The emails don’t self-combust, and the laundry survives. It’s all OK. I try and do this everything, just get out and escape it all {which is handy when you work from home}.
Blackmores are giving away a Mums Prize Pack, valued at $167.85. Share your best tips for getting stuff off your plate below to be in the running.
{boring bits}
Competition closes 31st May 2014
Open to Australian residents only
One entry per person
The winner of this competition is Lisa Bright. Congrats. x
I have written a timetable that is (more often than not) workable. With children, I know that it can be hard to manage a schedule, but I am finding that I can get more done when I have a set amount of time each day to do each task.
“just get in the car, and head to the beach {or where ever your happy place is} and forget it all… the world doesn’t end. The emails don’t self-combust, and the laundry survives. It’s all OK.” – love this, how true.
We have a roster now for the kids so they do some of the small jobs that just kinda get in my way like feeding animals and taking out the rubbish, I also try to delegate jobs for each day instead of trying to do everything at once like floors on Mondays, sheets on Wednesdays, bathrooms on Fridays etc I am always going to be busy we both work and we have 5 young children so routines, rosters and lists work great in our household
Organisation and routine. Both of which don’t come naturally and I have to consciously WORK at. My stress levels are manageable when I don’t have to locate clothing/socks/drink bottles/that piece of paper for my appointment. When I keep on top of chores and keep to schedule I feel calmer. Easier said that done!
Prioritise!!!! Turn that ‘to do list’ into several lists. Make 7 daily lists and see how much more manageable it looks. Everything DOES NOT need to be done today! Once you draw up those smaller lists just take them a day at a time. Multi tasking is fine but if you’re like me, you try to juggle 10 things at once and then get mad at yourself for not doing each perfectly so I concentrate on one or two at a time and feel much better about the results. We are our own worst critics! Nobody else minds or judges us as much as we do ourselves so be kinder to yourself as well!
Just do it!!! You know all the mundane, everyday chores that seem to take up so much time… just do them!!! I used to sit there and dwell on the long list of not so fun things I needed to do. Now I just get them done as quickly snd efficiently as possible. Lists are great, but by the time you’ve made a list of all the things you know you need to do… that you do everyday or close to it… you could have already completed two or three tasks off that list! !!
I plan something for the end of the week, going out for dinner, catching up with friends, buying something that I really want etc. that I’m only allowed to do if I get everything on my to do list done. It’s like a little reward for clearing my plate! I’m studying teaching as well as staying home with my 4 month old baby girl, so I find this technique motivates me to work on uni assignments that I really don’t want to do!
Nearly 12 weeks ago, I broke my leg and badly torn the ligament in my ankle. I am only now allowed to put some weight on it with the aid of crutches. Crutches do not allow you to do much more than hang onto them when you are not moving. For 3 months my plate has been very empty. Guess what? The world goes on without me in it. I have learned to delegate and ask for help. I had to. My plate is still empty as I am only worrying about each day as it comes, with the help of my husband, ds20 and ds16. Perhaps their plates are a little fuller though! LOL
Ask for help. Usually things are only on your plate because they need to be done. Which is why you’re running around in your pjs with breakfast in your hair having a 3 way conversation with yourself about what to do next. Who needs clothes and a shower, right? Ask for help, tell someone you are struggling and here’s the hard part, let them help without micromanaging their every decision or move. More hands make light work.
Just ok can be good enough. Its not the perfect gift, I didn’t roast the chicken myself, I only swept not vacuumed, I skipped some of the goodnight story, I didn’t do it perfectly this time but I’m still crossing those things off as done and I’m going to be ok, with them just being ok.
Every little bit counts. Don’t have time to clean the entire house but you have 5 minutes? While the kitchen sink is filling, squirt some bleach into the toilet then come back and wash up 5 things. Or, use those 5 minutes to tidy away the endless kids toys. Making tiny dents in things still means you’re achieving some thing, just in small bites
Hi Lisa. I loved your tips. You’re the winner of this competition. Can you please email me at hello@fatmumslim.com.au with your postal address and I’ll get your prize organised ASAP.
Thanks. x
I find that laughter and practical jokes are the best way to keep your sanity and get stuff of your plate! For instance if your children are misbehaving and you can no longer take it put a medium sized garbage bin on the kitchen table and wait for one of them to ask what it’s for. Respond by saying that “Due to the economy we are going to have to let one of you go!” The perplexed look on their face is priceless – then hug them both and tell them you love them, and of course, that no one is going anywhere. Their past behaviour is forgotten because there’s nothing that a big group hug won’t fix!
Another way to keep your sanity is to just escape! Pack the kids and a hairdryer into the car and drive to a street with medium to busy traffic. Sit in your parked car and point the hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down! The kids will find it hilarious!
For pure amusement when you’re next at the bank and the money comes out of the ATM scream “I won!”, “I won!”, “Third time this week!”
Finally if all else fails, pop some popcorn with the lid off and sit back and relax
with a nice cold glass of diet water! Ha, ha!
Love this article. Taking the pressure off and redefining the meaning of ‘having it all’ is top priority! For me taking things off the plate means taking a minute out from the frantic flow of the day. I write the list and then having a 10 minute mindfulness moment (I use a guided meditation audio book I downloaded on iTunes). After taking this time out i then go back to the list a realistically group the to do list into ‘must do’ and ‘nice to do’. This is just a simple considered approach to what is necessary and what you will do if you have the time. It’s helping me feel less stressed on a daily basis.
If it will take one minute or less, then do it NOW – for example, put something back in the right spot, take empty box to the recycling bin, wash your coffee cup… procrastinate on those little things and you’ll never get the bigger things off your plate!
I take time out even if just one hour to go out of the house to have a coffee and read the papers or simply sit in the sun sans bub. I do this on the weekend so hubby can look after bub. It really relaxes me and gives me time to think.
I find it gives me more energy to come back home and tackle things I’ve been putting off!
I blog or write about my frustrations as it gives me clarity to how I am feeling and then I read a foreign aid article or two to get perspective with my life. I then work out what is important and what is not and the things that are not important I say no to. I also try and not overfill my plate. Sometimes we live life as if it’s a buffet when it should be experienced like a three course meal.
I try to think about what I want my kids to remember in 20 years, a super clean house or all the time we spent together? It always helps me get my priorities right!!
Kim. galwayst@hotmail.com
Great tips! Thanks for sharing them. 🙂